Page 27

“I need a car,” Harry thought to himself.

It wasn’t just a grey, dreary day—it was a rainy, grey, dreary day, and Harry was on a stakeout watching a man who’d been in an accident and won a large insurance claim. The insurance company didn’t believe the man—Jeremy—was actually injured and had hired Harry to prove it. It would be a nice payday once he had proof, at least a month’s rent.

But right now it was cold and wet, and Harry was huddled beneath a tree trying to stay dry, a coffee cupped in his hands for warmth. Every now and then, during a slight lull in the rain, he’d walk up and down the street but always kept his eyes on the house across the way.

“Even a jalopy,” he mused. “Something with a roof. A radio’s optional. It could even come from a smoker. Just something to keep dry in.”

He took another sip of coffee and watched the house.

“I’d really like to catch up on rent, too. Tee Tee’s good for letting me slide. I just hate taking advantage of her good nature. I wonder what new menu item Buben’s cooking up today. I really liked his Twin Mound Hashbrowns—even if they were just hashbrowns shaped like boobs. Hashbrowns would be tasty right now. Fresh, hot hashbrowns. And an egg. I wish I could afford eggs. Or grits. I wonder what I could put in my ramen to make it taste better. Maybe some salt.”

Another sip reminded Harry he wasn’t in anyone’s kitchen but was, in fact, out in the elements waiting for a man to exit his house who may or may not be injured.

“Tofu,” Harry thought suddenly. “Sweet and sour tofu on a bed of rice.”

Tofu wasn’t a food normally associated with detectives, and Harry knew it, but he’d made a conscious decision years ago not to eat meat. Animals were living creatures too, and he respected that.

“Vegetable fried rice. That would be so tasty…”

The thought drifted off as, out of the corner of his eye, Harry saw animals coming down the street.

Not cats. Not dogs. Not the normal kind you’d see in a city.

Cows. Two of them. And a mule.

Two cows and a mule.

Now where did they come from?

Harry watched in disbelief as the wet cows and the mule materialised through the rain, hoofprints splashing in the puddles. One of the cows wore a bell that clanged with each rhythmic step. They walked in unison, like they knew exactly what they were doing.

Sipping his coffee as they drew closer, Harry froze when one cow broke formation and approached him directly.

Harry wasn’t an animal person—he had Tootles the cat, but that was more of a business arrangement—and he knew nothing about cows.

Yet this cow came right up to him, bold as brass. Close enough that Harry could reach out to pet it, which he did.

“Mooooo,” said the cow on the street.

The mule bleated in reply.

The cow in front of Harry made eye contact and then—Harry was sure of it—nuzzled his hand.

“Mooo.”

And with that, it turned and rejoined its companions. The three farm animals continued down the street, around the corner, and out of sight.

Harry shook his head. Was there no one else around who saw that?

That woke him faster than any cup of coffee ever could—which was good, because his coffee was now empty.

For a moment Harry forgot that he was cold, when suddenly his prey… er… the man he was following… came out of his house. Uninjured.

Harry smiled. He took out his camera—a simple point-and-shoot 35 mm—and snapped his pictures.

He clicked the shutter.

Click.

Rent money was coming.